The Great TV Show Title Jumble

By on Sep 17, 2013 in Inanities |

Today in Hypothetical Alternate Realities: What would happen if two totally different shows exchanged words in their titles? Behold. Drag Notice — HR representatives are replaced by drag queens, who then put delinquent employees on notice. “Gurl, you betta werk!” RuPaul’s Burn Race — RuPaul trades her loving “shade” for appallingly cruel barbs (punctuated, of course, by her trademark cackle). Pretty Little Anarchy — Four teenage fashionistas live to regret having overthrown the government of Rosewood. Sons of Liars — Four grown sons of formerly-teenage fashionistas form a motorcycle gang… and dish about small-town secrets over nonfat lattes. The Good Stars — An inventory of all the celebrities in Hollywood who haven’t been arrested for DUI, become a Scientologist, flashed their nether regions, or made anti-Semitic remarks. Dancing with the Wife —...

Ratings Revelations and Ridiculousness

By on Jun 5, 2012 in Tinseltown |

As reported by TV.com, Nielsen has released a list of all the shows on broadcast networks this past season, ranked by average number of viewers in the 18-to-49-year-old demographic… and the list is surprising on many counts. I’ve transposed the complete list below, but in case you want the abridged version (you impatient ingrates!), I readily relinquish my reflections and ruminations on the ratings ranking. The most-watched scripted show is Modern Family (ABC, #4), and that fact makes me damn proud of America. Good on you, viewers! CBS sitcoms continue to dominate, especially The Big Bang Theory (#6), Two and a Half Men (#7), and 2 Broke Girls (#9). And, against all rational thought, Rules of Engagement (#35) is still surprisingly popular. I mean, I don’t know anyone who watches it, but… Grey’s Anatomy (#10) is doing remarkably well for a show entering its...

An Elegy for the Remote-Free

By on Aug 1, 2009 in Tinseltown |

The following post was originally published on my old blog on April 1, 2009. One of my favorite practices this season was Fox’s “remote-free TV” model, in which the networks aired fewer commercials during each episode of Fringe and Dollhouse—while charging advertisers more for the exclusivity—in an effort to keep viewers watching live, instead of recording the shows and fast-forwarding through the commercials. I liked it because, as a result, each episode’s running time was 49 or 50 minutes, instead of just 42 or 43 minutes. Unfortunately, the experiment had its share of setbacks, according to this article at Airlock Alpha. Even though viewers paid more attention to the ads, many companies were reluctant to shell out the extra bucks. Also, each episode was more expensive to produce—and the extra minutes of each episode would be cut if the show was ever to air on...