2011 Primies: Best Shows

By on Jan 30, 2012 in The Primies |

My year-end accolades (or year-beginning ones, as the case may be) always come with a disclaimer: I haven’t watched all the awesome TV out there. There’s no Boardwalk Empire on this list, no Homeland, no Game of Thrones… and I can’t even award Breaking Bad because I’ve only seen three episodes of this year’s season! But, c’mon, every TV critic must be missing out on something worthwhile… at least, those TV critics with social lives. (And I should know—I used to not have one to speak of!) Anyway, enough navel-gazing. Of the shows I’ve followed consistently, here are my favorites. American Horror Story The Good Wife (2010: #8) Modern Family (2010: #4) Justified (2010: #10) Dexter Parenthood Community (2010: #5) Parks and Recreation (2010: #7) Fringe (2010: #6) True...

2011 Primies: Best Moments

By on Jan 27, 2012 in The Primies |

We all watch television in eager anticipation of those watercooler moments—those moments so shocking, so emotional, so incredibly awesome that we have to a) rewind to watch them about twenty times and b) rehash them to death with all of our fellow watchers. And I honor my picks for those moments here, along with video clips of each moment from YouTube and Hulu (which will hopefully still work in six months). Bear in mind that I did not (and surely could not) see every worthwhile show on television in 2011, and I might be behind on the ones I do watch, so I will most certainly snub deserving moments. Also, I chose not to go Googling to remember these events; if they didn’t come immediately to mind, they must not be momentous enough to merit a place on this list. WARNING: MASSIVE SPOILERS AHEAD! You may just want to look at the show names in the parentheses before looking at the...

2011 Primies: Best Characters

By on Jan 12, 2012 in The Primies |

The start of a new year makes us all reflect on the previous 365 days, but it makes this blogger reminisce not only about the year that was but also the television that was. That’s right: as is tradition this time of year, it’s time for another round of the Primies. Not the most prestigious awards, perhaps, but let’s hope it’s a bit more entertaining (and maybe even more credible) than last night’s People Choice Awards? In any case, here are the characters I appreciated the most in 2011. And I should also take this opportunity to categorically commend the actors who portray these characters, since even the best writing needs the perfect delivery. Finally, let this be a warning to all ye who continue: spoilers abound! Debra Morgan (Dexter) This season saw this profanity-spewing Miami Metro detective was make lieutenant, but the promotion alienated her from...

How “Grey’s” Can Get Its Groove Back

By on Dec 23, 2011 in In Production |

My other blogging gig is covering Grey’s Anatomy for Wetpaint Entertainment, and I wanted to share the following article here on Primetimely since it’s one of which I’m particularly proud. (You can see it in its original Wetpaint context here.) The preamble is true: I do love Grey’s—but I do see its faults and its wear and tears of age, and I have some humble suggestions. We love Grey’s Anatomy, and not just because doing so is our job here at Wetpaint Entertainment. But we’re still critical of it — and while this season and the last were better than, say, seasons 5 and 6, we’re a long ways away from the Grey’s glory days. So we took it upon ourselves to make the show great again… or to at least offer the writers some friendly suggestions. Here are five prescriptions for the writers to administer once an episode until the...

New Show Haiku

By on Dec 6, 2011 in Inanities |

Like every other reputable TV critic, I’ve seen absolutely none of this season’s crop of new shows, except for the first episode and a half of New Girl. (Cut a guy some slack; we’ve been trying to slash Dexter from my to-watch list.) So since there’s no time like the holidays for frivolity, let me recklessly and unfairly pass judgment on all the broadcast network’s new scripted offerings… in haiku form! Bonus: Watch as my poetic form deteriorates toward the end of the post! Charlie’s Angels Lame reboot; no buzz Not even Minka Kelley could save these Angels Pan Am Flight attendant? Hah! You call her “stewardess” Or just say “Ricci.” How To Be a Gentleman In laugh-less sitcom, One guy is Johnny Drama, Other’s just up-tight Allen Gregory I’m not sure what makes This Jonah-Hill-voiced kid Diff’rent than...

“Gossip Girl” Is Not Terrible—There, I’ve Said It!

By on Nov 3, 2011 in Inner Monologues |

Hello, my name is Dan Clarendon, and I’m an addict. Ladies and gentlemen, I’m afraid to say I’ve had a bit of a setback. I thought my life was better off without Gossip Girl. Only a year and a half ago, I publicly condemned it, deeming it “flat” and “uninteresting.” I criticized the fact that none of the characters mature and that none of the break-ups and make-ups matter because none of them last. Well, I’ve been tempted again, and I have to admit, I lost control. But it wasn’t my fault, I swear—I have enablers! My boyfriend is a junkie, too. And Netflix is my supplier. How can I help myself when every episode from the past four seasons is available to stream instantly? I started using Gossip Girl again to indulge my boyfriend because I know he loves it and I didn’t hate it. So I figured I’d get caught up so that we...