The Prime Times: Next Season’s Guest Stars Edition

By on Jun 25, 2012 in In Brief |

This installment of the Prime Times is all about the cool guest stars we’ll all get to see on our favorite shows… in a few months’ time. Sorry for the blue balls, folks. With the seventh-season premiere a torturous three months away, Showtime has released a teaser-trailerfocusing on the fallout from last season’s “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain with a knife” finale. More details are surfacing about the second season of FX’s creepfest American Horror Story. Now we know that Jessica Lange will play a nun and administrator (presumably in the 1960s-era East Coast insane asylum, which was previously announced as the season’s setting). And filling out the cast are Adam Levine and James Cromwell. ER reunion ho! Maura Tierney will recur on the next season of The Good Wife, sharing the screen once again with Julianna Margulies. According to Deadline, Tierney will play “a...

Ratings Revelations and Ridiculousness

By on Jun 5, 2012 in Tinseltown |

As reported by TV.com, Nielsen has released a list of all the shows on broadcast networks this past season, ranked by average number of viewers in the 18-to-49-year-old demographic… and the list is surprising on many counts. I’ve transposed the complete list below, but in case you want the abridged version (you impatient ingrates!), I readily relinquish my reflections and ruminations on the ratings ranking. The most-watched scripted show is Modern Family (ABC, #4), and that fact makes me damn proud of America. Good on you, viewers! CBS sitcoms continue to dominate, especially The Big Bang Theory (#6), Two and a Half Men (#7), and 2 Broke Girls (#9). And, against all rational thought, Rules of Engagement (#35) is still surprisingly popular. I mean, I don’t know anyone who watches it, but… Grey’s Anatomy (#10) is doing remarkably well for a show entering its...

The Prime Times: Figure It Out Edition

By on Mar 9, 2012 in In Brief |

Here’s all the TV news you need to know (read: a dozen news items you don’t need to know but are fun anyway). A Baltimore man was arrested on a handgun charge recently, and he happens to share the same name as a notorious character on The Wire: Omar Little, Jr. FOX chose not to renew Terra Nova for a second season, but word on the street is that Netflix is interested in picking it up. Keri Russell has joined the FX pilot “The Americans,” as a KGB spy living with an arranged husband in Washington D.C. during the 1980s. Nickelodeon is bringing back 1990s game show Figure It Out, in which a panel of celebrities have to parse out the layperson-guest’s unique talent. Sigourney Weaver is set to play a divorced-First-Lady-turned-Secretary-of-State in a new series on USA entitled Political Animals. A&E is developing a series called Bates Motel, which provides...

Shit My Boyfriend Says

By on Feb 1, 2012 in Inanities |

or, A Television-Related Word Association Experiment With the Love of My Life Here’s a list of every current show I watch, and my boyfriend’s instant reaction to each. 30 Rock “Oh, Tina Fey…” (smiles) American Horror Story “Thrills me.” Boardwalk Empire “Costumes…” Breaking Bad “Oh, I don’t know.  I don’t know.  Come back to me with that one.” Burn Notice “Never saw it… oh, but that guy is hot.” Californication “Gah… can’t get into it… but I want to.” Community “Growing on me.” Cougar Town “Stupid.” Covert Affairs “Oh, Piper Peek-a-boo.  That’s what my dad calls her… looks pretty stupid, though.  It looks like a dumbed-down Alias, if Alias could be any dumber.” Curb Your Enthusiasm “I hate...

2011 Primies: Best Shows

By on Jan 30, 2012 in The Primies |

My year-end accolades (or year-beginning ones, as the case may be) always come with a disclaimer: I haven’t watched all the awesome TV out there. There’s no Boardwalk Empire on this list, no Homeland, no Game of Thrones… and I can’t even award Breaking Bad because I’ve only seen three episodes of this year’s season! But, c’mon, every TV critic must be missing out on something worthwhile… at least, those TV critics with social lives. (And I should know—I used to not have one to speak of!) Anyway, enough navel-gazing. Of the shows I’ve followed consistently, here are my favorites. American Horror Story The Good Wife (2010: #8) Modern Family (2010: #4) Justified (2010: #10) Dexter Parenthood Community (2010: #5) Parks and Recreation (2010: #7) Fringe (2010: #6) True...